NFL RedZone Channel...Where Have You Been All My Life?

Alright, so the most impossible thing happened to me on Sunday. No I didn't actually get up on time for church. You should have known that from my article on Sunday. And no, I didn't all of a sudden decide to stop drinking sodas (anyone that knows me would know that would be a miracle). No, I actually found something that made me like the NFL more than I did before Sunday. I know, shocking. What is it, you ask? What could this unbelievable, shocking thing be??? Well, it is the NFL's newest television channel...NFL RedZone!

Now let me start by saying that there will those out there that can sympathies with me on this next comment. I am in a sports market that has to be forced to watch a horrible team without any control over it. I cheer when they are on a bye week. I'm kind of excited when they get a Saturday or Thursday game, because that means I will be free to watch another game that Sunday. Alright, I'll tell you what the team is. It's the Raiders.

Now don't everyone come give me a hug just yet. A little backstory on how much I can't stand the Raiders and also the Rams. When I lived in Southern California, I was forced to watch their games. The Raiders played in the L.A. Coliseum and the Rams played at the Big A in Anaheim. Neither team would sell out games so guess what I ended up watching on Sundays? A lovely black screen. Then a miracle happened. Both teams realized that nobody gave a crap about them and they decided to move to St. Louis and Oakland respectively. So then I get excited and guess what? The NFL thinks that Southern California still likes them and makes us watch them on Sundays. There were times that I would have rather watched the black screen.

So the NFL was 15 years to late, but they debuted their newest channel the NFL RedZone and it comes on the air at 9:55 AM PST and goes off the air at 4:30 PM PST. Guess how many commercials happen in the six hours and thirty-five minutes it is on the air? Zero! Zip! Nada! So it starts off at 9:55 with a countdown clock on the screen. As I'm staring at the screen, my heart started to pump and a weird thought crossed my mind. What if the countdown was for a bomb in my TV and it was about to blow up? Who cares, this countdown idea was brilliant and made me want to go tackle my neighbor mowing his lawn next door.

The next six hours and thirty-five minutes of commercial free football are probably the most exciting six hours and thirty-five minutes of sports I have ever watched straight. Don't give me that I have never watched that much sports straight. Hello, I'll give you two examples. New Year's Day football and any major that Tiger Woods has a chance to win on Sunday. As I was saying. This channel never leaves the action.

As you can probably guess, you get to see when a team reaches the RedZone. I'm not talking about the team that is in your sports market. I'm talking about any team playing on Sunday. That's right, who needs the Sunday Ticket package anymore? Guess what? You also get to see every touchdown scored, either live or 30 seconds after it happens. I encourage all people with epilepsy to take caution before watching it though because it sounds something like this....Let's go to Cleveland and touchdown Adrian Peterson...next let's go to Cincinnati and touchdown Brandon Stokley....next let's go to Atlanta and touchdown Tony Gonzalez...next let's go to Houston and touchdown Thomas Jones. It's that intense!

So that's it. The NFL has finally answered my prayers that I made 15 years ago. With some therapy I'm finally getting over my fear of blackouts and watching the Raiders and Rams play. The twitch is almost gone. When you watch the channel on Sunday and you pause to go take a leak, try to think about the poor announcer that has to talk for six hours and thirty-minutes straight during commercial free sports bliss. Now try not to laugh and miss the toilet.

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